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Nyeusi Hekima
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Friday, December 5, 2008
How To Cheat-Proof Your Relationship
Many people have been in relationships that did not work out for one reason or another, however the most devastating reason for a break-up is cheating. Cheating is traumatic to many because it is human nature to need something to depend on. However, monogamy is not natural, it is a choice that has to be made using high cognitive function. Having said that, let's be clear and understand that having more than one partner is NOT synonymous with cheating. Cheating is only cheating when all parties involved are not aware that one or more individuals in a sexual union are not being honest about who they are having sex with.
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75% of men and 65% of women admit to having sex with people they work with.
Too much focus has been placed on monogamy, but not enough focus is placed on honesty. When monogamy is the focus many will just pretend to be monogamous to keep from being honest. There are many situations where people just omit to tell the truth while still practicing dishonesty in their relationships. The idea of monogamy is a beautiful thing, but everyone is not going to practice it. This encourages those who have a hard time with sticking to just one partner to lie about what they are doing. The shame should not be placed on not being monogamous, however the shame should be placed on being dishonest.
38% of people have engaged in explicit online sexual conversation and 50% of people have made phone contact with someone they chatted with online.
Truth telling should began long before the sexual relationship starts. Little things like telling the truth about the foods you like and don't like. Never pretend to be someone you are not or like something you don't.
It is easy to pretend to be monogamous to get what you want, but it is very difficult to practice honesty and risk losing what you want.
Why do people cheat?
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Many people ask this question, but the foundation of this question is simple. Monogamy is not natural. Monogamy is an act that requires a higher functioning purpose. That function is cognitive choice and the purpose is relative to the individual’s goals and perceptions of life.
Although infidelity is as old as this world the reasons for infidelity can vary according to social environment, childhood experiences, religious views, and many other factors come into play when it comes to being monogamous.
Before we get too far into this valuable information, let’s first define what monogamy means. Monogamy is defined as having a single sexual partner for a period of time. Many use the term faithful interchangeably with the word monogamy, but faithfulness is defined as being devoted to a person, cause or obligation. Well, let’s see…what about loyalty? Loyal is defined as being closely tied to another by affection or faith. The one word that ties loyal and faithfulness together is dependability. Dependability is defined as to be confident in or to rely on something or someone. Now that we have the definitions to the basic words used when discussing infidelity, what does the word cheat mean? Cheat means to deceive by trickery, mislead, fool or violate rules deliberately.
I have said all of this to say, cheating is not about monogamy at all. Cheating is about deceiving and deliberately violating the rules of a relationship. The biggest complaint with cheating is that people often feel let down; insecure, fearful, and unsafe when the one they put all of their trust in deliberately violates the rules of the relationship. But wait! How many of us actually have rules and contracts in a relationship?
22 percent of married men have strayed at least once during their married lives.
The e-book "How to Cheat-Proof Your Relationship" will give you valuable information that you can use right now if you are dealing with infidelity in your relationship.
"How to Cheat-Proof Your Relationship" contains:
- 10 mistakes people make in relationships that contribute to cheating and how you can avoid them
- 34 relationship renegotiation questions
- A love partnership contract
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This book is NOT about catching your spouse cheating. It is NOT about how to get back at your lover for cheating. This book IS about providing you with tools to help prevent or lower the risk of cheating or being cheated on in your relationship. Nothing can keep your lover from cheating on you if they want to, but you do not have to contribute to the problem. By doing what you can on your end you can be proactive instead of reactive when such an unfortunate incident occurs.
Find out NOW how you can cheat-proof your relationship!
Until next time,
Moon Child
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